thehoosh:

automatic-caution-door:

this is cute

woegarden:

i had the funniest fucking dream i was hanging out with michael jackson and someone asked him what his pronouns were and he said “he/hee!” and i woke up crying

exceptionalcelestial:

laviebohemianrhapsody:

millennial-review:

“millenials are so stupid, they can’t perform basic life skills” cries the generation that failed to teach their children basic life skills

also a lot of those practical skills were taught in classes like home ec that have been cut completely as schools slash all spending not related to sports and STEM

diagnosis-prognosis-psychosis:

parking-lot-pussy:

wereralph:

Me and my werewolf boyfriend making out in the Self Checkout

^the Walmart worker that you called over five minutes ago because your item wouldn’t scan

actualaster:

mhalachai:

thoughtsyouread:

this is a strip club in vancouver.

to clarify, David Duchovny is banned from the No. 5 Orange strip club for comments he made in the late 90s about Vancouver’s crappy weather, not for  behavior that normally gets one banned from a strip club. 

This is even better with context

adashofniallandasprinkleoflunacy:

me as i ingest unhealthy amounts of carbohydrates to drown out my problems 

quorpiest:

dragontatoes:

Warm blooded creature: wow I’m chilly

Warm blooded creature: *vibrates*

Cold blooded creature: wow I’m chilly

Cold blooded creature: goes into a coma

emotionalempowerer:

I could watch this all day.

aubreysflame:

the-goat-of-dojima:

hennythingspossible:

bigchiefatl:

tilthat:

TIL Researchers at Yale did a study on teaching monkeys to use money to buy things like grapes, jello and other things. It turns out once the monkeys learned they could buy things with the money they started paying females monkeys for sex, who in turn immediately bought some sweets with it.

via reddit.com

Originally posted by usedpimpa

😂😂😂😂😂

It gets better

You ruined a perfectly good monkey is what you did. Look at it. It’s got Capitalism.

51don:

my girl can wear whatever she want cause I can fight

halliehasissues:

unofficially-nasa:

nutwit:

dumb-science-jokes:

adventuresinchemistry:

New Years Resolution for 2015:

Science really fucking hard

New Years Resolution for 2016:

Science even fucking harder

New Years Resolution for 2017:

Science the fucking hardest

New Years Resolution for 2018:

Science the best, like no one has before!

New years resolution for 2019:

Science so fucking great, like no fuckers have done before!

signhereplease:

cryptid-sighting:

kittykat8311:

naamahdarling:

I’m losing my fucking mind.

oh my god

my favorite part is that the guys just go along with it in spite of confusion/misgivings because they don’t want to miss out on stickers.

My favorite post

toadprince:

Tinder/HER profile with 5 pictures of the blandest and most forgettable looking straight woman and 1 blurry picture of the ugliest and baldest straight man anyone has ever seen: Looking for a 🦄 to do some 420 and make one of us cum for the first time in our depressing pathetic relationship 🍑🍆